“What will matter is the good we did, not the good we expected others to do” ~ Elizabeth Lesser
My primary goal for this podcast was to create a space for discussions about ‘desi divorce’, a subject that is not spoken about. And today I am excited to share the first of these conversations right here on my podcast.
My first guest is Vani, a new friend I made through my book, Rewriting My Happily Ever After – a memoir of divorce and discovery.
In December 2021 I spent a few weeks in the US. On a weeklong trip to San Diego, I was at the beach at La Jolla on a sunny Saturday afternoon. The water and the sky was beautiful and blue, the air was clear and salty. Tourists lingered at various points taking pictures of a wedding on the beach, children licking ice cream cones or spotting large groups of seals sunning on the sands.
I took a picture of a lonesome seal, away from his friends, lying happily by himself and posted it on Instagram. Little did I know that the lazy seal would connect Vani and me. She was reading my book in San Diego and happened to not just find me on Insta but pointed out that the lone seal was something we had both spotted that same day.
We connected and spoke several times and when I asked her to be my first podcast guest, she wholeheartedly supported me by getting on a call despite our 15 hour time zone difference.
Vani shares the ups and downs of her divorce journey including the influence of family and cultural expectations. As she broke one self-limiting belief after another on her way to an independent life, she found that she “amazed herself”.
Leaving behind a long marriage, bringing up a teenage son while dealing with the turmoil of a pandemic is not easy, yet Vani found helpful people, made genuine friends and discovered peace in books and routines and practices that helped make her the strong, positive and vibrant person that she is today.
Whether you are thinking about divorce, have come out from an unhappy marriage or are curious about how women fare after divorce, do listen and let me know your thoughts.
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